Condensed milk...anyone????

I have gone completely off the rails the last 2 weeks. Today I almost had a tin of condensed milk...correction...I just went to the kitchen and finshed the last dregs of it...so it is done.....I have finished a whole tin of condensed milk!!! I have not done this for a while now and I had thought I had gone past all of this....but clearly not!!

I then went trawling through different blogs to get some thing to stick in my brain and one of the blogs titles Gwennie said 'I am strong, I am smart, I am fit, I am healthy' and it struck me that minus the condensed milk I did see myself as smart, fit and healthy but the difference was I did not believe it and did not display it. I tend to fall down when I am succeeding...i tend to sabotage myself. Why? no idea? maybe it is coz I do not want to believe I can succeed coz I already believe I won't and in making that my truth I dont leave space to be proven wrong? Now how is that for a head fuck?? I must be mad

I will do better tomorrow and I will write a blog tomorrow. This is my mantra for the next 24 hours... and yes I will also write my food diary on calorieking.